Pre-birthday syndrome

My mom and I went out today. My birthday is in less than a few days, and I tried to find something I would like as a gift. I’m being such a big baby this time around. Every year I resolve to take my birthday well, but this year I must have the birthday equivalent of PMS…PBS? It’s so embarrassing, and definitely not my norm. Everything reduces me to having a sob fest. Boo-hooing while at the mall, while walking down the street, while reading my email. I’m hoping that I will become philosophical about it within a few days, or that this will just pass. I can remember, back in high school, my French teacher turning red, wiping away her tears, and trying not to cry in front of us over her birthday. I felt bad for her but I didn’t really understand back then. It didn’t seem like a big deal at the time.

So, I wasn’t a good shopper today, but I did get a new book on crocheting, the crochet version of the knitting book I just got and liked, 200 Crochet Tips, Techniques, and Trade Secrets by Jan Eaton. Unfortunately, I also tried to get a “rain” check for a date I had tonight, earlier, by email, because I felt too awkward for a phone call and wasn’t sure of the details, but he called later from the coffee shop where he thought we were meeting, having never gotten my message. I’m glad he didn’t sound angry, and I’m glad I didn’t cry! Hopefully, tomorrow I will enter a cry-free zone and things will be normal again. I don’t want to become like Holly Hunter’s character in Raising Arizona. It’s too ridiculous.